Redemption
by Starlight Rose
Summary: In his wanderings Soujiro meets a kind old couple that teach him a few lessons about kindness and forgiveness. This is only the first part of what might be a long fic but the rest will be a long time in coming.


Redemption  
By: Starlight Rose  
Part: 1/?  
  
Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin does not belong to me but to Nobuhiro  
Watsuki and therefore the character of Soujiro belongs to that talented  
artist too. I'm making no profit off of this.  
  
A.N. This is my first attempt at a Rurouni Kenshin fanfic so be nice.  
I've seen the entire anime series though I still have a lot of the   
manga to see so this is in no way related to anything that happens   
later in RK well at least not in this part.  
  
  
A soft spring breeze blew gently past a young wanderer as he traveled   
in search of some answers. He had been searching for the answer to an   
important question for over two years now and although he had come   
close, the answer still eluded him. He walked leisurely down the dirt   
road not knowing where he was going just knowing that he needed to keep   
traveling. His clothes were tattered and his hair was in need of some   
trimming. Strapped to his side was a sword and plastered on his face   
was a sweet, innocent smile. The sun beat down upon his head as he   
passed by a pretty meadow. He paused briefly to gaze out at the meadow   
and noticed some lovely morning glories growing quietly along the   
roadside. Their pink and purple blossoms glistened with morning dew as   
they reflected the sunlight.  
  
Soujiro stood staring at the morning glories as he felt his heart   
constrict within him. It had been several months now since he had   
buried the gentle old couple that had first taught him the meaning of   
kindness, but the pain of their death still dwelled within his young   
heart. The old lady, Namura Makoto-san, had loved morning glories. They   
used to grow all over the front of her tiny home. She would tend those   
flowers and take care of the house during the day as Soujiro and her   
husband Akira took care of their small plot of land. The couple was   
poor but they were happy.  
  
Soujiro remembered when he first met them. He had been traveling for   
over a year and was no closer to finding the answer to his question   
than when he had started. He was walking down a similar road, but   
unlike the cool spring weather that he was enjoying now, the weather   
then was unbearably hot. He hadn't eaten in over three days and the   
heat and hunger was beginning to wear down even his strength. He   
staggered clumsily along trying to find shade and food. Finally he   
collapsed through sheer exhaustion in front of a little hut. When he   
woke he could feel a cool piece of cloth on his head. Opening his eyes,   
he saw a pair of gentle brown eyes set in a tanned and wrinkled face,   
gazing at him with concern.  
  
"So young man, you're finally awake. How do you feel?" A kind and   
gentle voice asked him.  
  
"Much better, arigatou gozaimasu. Anou...where am I and how did I get   
here?" Soujiro asked the old woman.  
  
"You are in my home. My name is Namura Makoto. I found you unconscious   
outside by the door. With my husband's help, I got you into the house."  
  
"Arigatou for helping me, demo I have no money to repay you with."   
Soujiro told the woman looking downcast and ashamed.  
  
Makoto snorted, "You don't need to repay me or my husband, but would   
you mind telling me your name and what you were doing?"  
  
"Hai. My name is Seta Soujiro and I am a rurouni."  
  
The woman gazed at him with compassionate eyes, "Someone as young as   
you? Ma, ma. These are interesting times. You must be hungry by now.   
I'll go get you some food."  
  
"Oh no. You don't need to do that. I'm fine really. Arigatou for   
letting me rest in your house, but I really should be going now. I   
really wouldn't want to inconvenience you." Soujiro replied frantically   
getting up. The old woman had been more than kind towards him taking   
him into her house and taking care of him. He did not want to trouble   
her further by eating her food as well. Unfortunately for him, his   
stomach belied his words and started to growl from the emptiness caused   
by three days traveling without food.  
  
Makoto chuckled softly when she heard his stomach growl, "Tell me   
Soujiro, when was the last time you ate? You're all skin and bones."  
  
Shamefaced he replied, "Three days ago."  
  
"That long? Well we'll just have to fix that. Come stay for dinner and   
rest here for the night. You'll feel much better tomorrow and you'll be   
in a much better condition to travel, if you do. My husband should be   
coming home soon."  
  
"I wouldn't want to impose upon your hospitality."  
  
"You're not imposing upon anything. I enjoy having company around since   
we rarely get any. Come, make an old woman happy by obliging her. I'm   
much too old to argue with."  
  
Soujiro smiled his first real smile then. The woman's kindness truly   
touched him, "Hai. Arigatou, Namura-san. But I do not feel right about   
this. Please allow me to help you with something."  
  
"You can help by setting the table, while I go get supper ready. By the   
way you can call me Makoto and my husband's name is Akira." Makoto   
replied watching the boy. He seemed so innocent, but his eyes seemed to   
contain some hidden sadness. She could tell by the way that he reacted   
to her that he had led a hard life, most likely one where very few   
people were ever truly kind to him. These were indeed hard times.  
  
"Hai." Soujiro replied as he set about doing as Makoto-san had   
instructed him to do. Just as he was setting the last pair of   
chopsticks down the door creaked opened. On his guard he turned slowly   
around to see the smiling face of an old man. The man's hair was   
completely white and his back was bent from many years of hard work,   
but the man's brown eyes held a definite twinkle of kindness. Soujiro   
relaxed his guard as Makoto-san introduced him to her husband, Akira.  
  
"Soujiro-san, I'm glad to see you are feeling better." Akira told him   
as the three sat eating the simple meal that Makoto had prepared.  
  
"Hai, arigatou gozaimasu."  
  
"Do you mind me asking you where you were headed?"  
  
"Iie. I'm not really headed anywhere. I'm a rurouni."  
  
Akira looked at the young boy in shock. "Someone as young as you. You   
can't be more than sixteen years old. Why would someone so young choose   
to become a rurouni?"  
  
Soujiro blushed bright red at the old man's comment, "Anou...I'm   
actually twenty years old. Demo...I'm searching for something." Soujiro   
told the old couple as his eyes took on a distant look. The old couple   
exchanged glances with one another as they noticed the sad look in the   
young boy's eyes. They wondered what dark secrets were hidden behind   
the innocent smiling face, but they didn't press him further.  
  
"Soujiro-san, why don't you stay here and rest for a while? My wife and   
I would be happy to have your company."  
  
"Iie. I can't. I really have troubled the two of you enough as is. I   
couldn't impose upon the two of you further by staying here longer. I   
already don't know how to repay you."  
  
"If you want to repay us then stay here and rest for a while. I hate   
seeing such a nice young man traveling in weather like this. Not eating   
for three days and walking around in this heat, you're going to get sick   
if you continue traveling like you are now." Makoto replied.  
  
"Domo arigatou, but I really cannot."   
  
"I will not let you leave until you are well rested up. If you insist   
upon repaying us do so by staying. We are alone in this house and   
having company is very welcomed to us." Makoto insisted firmly.  
  
Soujiro gaped at the couple in awe. Never had anyone taken any care to   
be so kind to him. They were inviting him to stay in their home and   
impose himself upon them, without asking anything else in return from   
him. They merely wanted his company. Looking upon their determined   
faces, Soujiro hesitantly agreed.  
  
As Soujiro lay on a straw mattress that night, he truly contemplated   
for the first time in two years what exactly it was that Himera-san   
wanted him to learn on his journey. Himera-san had told him that he   
needed to find the answer of how to live his life for himself. For ten   
years he had lived and survived using the motto Shishio-san had taught   
him. He never taught to question it because the philosophy of, "The   
strong survive, the weak must die," had saved his life. Now for the   
first time he truly thought that maybe Himera-san was right after all.   
There was nothing wrong with being weak. Being strong did not mean   
you were right. The Namura's were weak, but yet they were able to give   
him feelings of security and warmth within one afternoon that he had   
never found with Shishio-san.   
  
Although he was slowly starting to understand an emotion that had been   
foreign to him for all his life, eighteen years of mental abuse kept   
him from believing in the goodness of people. From the time he was   
adopted into his family, he had lost any childlike innocence that he   
might have had. Now all he had left was a facade of innocence though in   
some remote core of him there was still an innocent child yearning for   
love. It was for that child that he had embarked on the journey that   
Himera-san had set forth for him. It was to find that child and to find   
redemption for the sins he had committed that he set out upon his journey.   
It wasn't like he felt guilt over the fact that he had killed so many   
people that he sought redemption. It was more the fact that it felt   
like he should. Now though, Soujiro felt guilt. He felt unworthy of   
being in the presence of the kind old couple. He fell asleep pondering   
why the Namura's were so kind to him.  
  
Soujiro woke up before the sun rose that morning. He folded his   
blankets neatly and quietly and opened the door with intentions of   
leaving. As he stepped out the front door, he hesitated. He considered   
how disappointed in him the Namuras would have been should he not keep   
his word and leave abruptly. It bothered him that only after spending   
one evening he was already worried about what they thought of him, but   
his feelings of guilt kept him standing immediately outside the door.   
He stood there as a gentle morning breeze blew past sweeping his hair   
across his eyes. Makoto opened the door to see him standing there like   
that with the sun rising over the horizon tinting the blue-black night   
sky a soft pink and purple. The look on Soujiro's young face seemed to   
be one full of sadness and longing. As he heard the door open Soujiro   
turned to face Makoto and for a brief second his eyes showed pain and   
regret that no one his age should have known. Not for the first time   
since she met him Makoto wondered just what the boy had experienced in   
his short life. The look was lost though when Soujiro resumed his   
pleasant smile.  
  
"Ohayo gozaimasu, Makoto-san." Soujiro greeted the old woman   
pleasantly.  
  
"Ohayo, Soujiro-kun. What are you doing out here so early. You weren't   
thinking of leaving were you?" Makoto asked glaring at the boy.  
  
"Iie. Iie. I was just admiring this beautiful sunrise. I rarely get a   
chance to pause and admire things like this." Soujiro replied waving   
his hands frantically in front of him trying to assure Makoto-san that   
he had no intentions of leaving or at least not yet.  
  
Makoto-san nodded her head silently and retreated back into the house   
with Soujiro following close behind her. Soujiro watched Makoto-san   
silently as she moved about the small hut preparing breakfast. He felt   
like an intruder in her home. Despite Makoto-san's efforts to make him   
feel welcomed, he felt out of place in the cozy hut. Sensing his   
unease, Makoto attempted to alleviate it by asking him for help.   
Smiling gratefully at her he obliged by helping her carry in some water   
and lighting the fire. In helping Makoto-san, Soujiro felt much less   
like he was merely trespassing on the old couple's hospitality, and   
more like a member of their family. He relaxed as he set about his   
tasks and then later sat down to breakfast with the old couple.  
  
After breakfast Akira left to go work in the fields. Soujiro began   
helping Makoto as she went about her daily tasks of cleaning the house.   
First she went outside to tend to her flower and vegetable gardens.   
Soujiro was surprised at seeing the garden. Although small, it held a   
certain undeniable charm and peace to it and it was well tended. For   
the first time in his life he was able to just stand idly admiring the   
flowers. Soujiro helped Makoto in the garden by attending to the more   
difficult tasks such as hoeing and fetching the water to water the   
plants with. After the garden was taken cared of, the two entered the   
house and began cleaning up the house. As Soujiro swept the tiny hut,   
Makoto cleared away the morning's dishes. In the garden the two had   
worked silently side by side, Soujiro basking in the feel of serenity   
of his surroundings and Makoto silently observing the young boy. Now   
Makoto breached the comfortable silence that had settled between the   
two as they worked, Makoto preparing lunch and Soujiro sweeping the   
floor, "Soujiro-kun?"  
  
"Hai, Makoto-san?"  
  
"Would you mind me asking what you are looking for that led you to   
become a rurouni?" Makoto asked watching Soujiro's reaction.  
  
Soujiro continued smiling sweetly, but a shadow of sadness seemed to   
descend over his eyes as he whispered softly, "For ten years of my   
life, I lived by a philosophy that I have now discovered is false.   
During that time I committed many sins. Now I am trying to atone for my   
sins by wandering the countryside and helping whomever I can. In doing   
so I hope to find what path in life I should take and maybe forgiveness   
for my sins though forgiveness is more than I deserve."  
  
Makoto looked wearily at Soujiro, "Soujiro...I don't know what happened   
in your past that would lead you to seek redemption. I don't know what   
sins you may have committed, nor do I want to know. It is your business   
and I have no right to inquire about it, but what I do know is that it   
is not all your fault."  
  
"Not all my fault?" Soujiro inquired in a disbelieving voice, "How can   
it not be all my fault?"  
  
"All the decisions we make are influenced by the events happening   
around us. At the time, the decision you made may have seemed to be the   
right decision or the only option left to you. Later on looking back at   
the choice you made it may seem like a big mistake that you'll regret   
for the rest of your life. But you need to learn to get past those   
mistakes and live your life. Looking at events in hindsight never   
helps. You need to learn from your past mistakes but not let them rule   
your life. Don't let the guilt you carry in you keep you from finding   
happiness. It is a hard lesson to learn but you are young and have time   
to learn it, but my one advice to you is to not let guilt and regret   
cloud your life anymore. Before you can go about asking forgiveness   
from others you have to be willing to forgive yourself and accept your   
mistakes. We all do things that we later regret but we all have to   
accept it and go on with our lives. It took me many years to come to   
terms with that. Some mistakes I made still haunt me even now, but I go   
on living my life and trying to be happy."  
  
"What mistakes could you have made that you regret so much, Makoto-san?   
You and Akira-san seem so content." Soujiro said as he took in what   
Makoto-san had said and began contemplating the truth in her words.  
  
Makoto smiled sadly at Soujiro, "Fifteen years ago there was a drought   
around this area. All the crops were dying and people were starving.   
At that time I had a grandchild, a beautiful little three-year old girl   
named Aya. Her father had died before she was born. He was killed by an   
accident. Her mother, my daughter, died soon after giving birth to her,   
so she was left in our care. We had raised her since birth and she was   
the most precious thing in the world to us.   
When the drought hit, we struggled to survive. Feeding Aya was   
our main concern but in even that it was becoming increasingly   
difficult. We left the area we were living in and tried to find a   
better place to live, but everywhere we went people were suffering.   
From wandering around without food for too long the two of us got sick,   
but we kept on trying to find a place that was not affected by the   
drought. Finally we came into a town where a nice foreign couple lived.   
The couple took us in and took care of us for awhile. While we   
were staying with them they had grown attached to Aya. Akira and I did   
not want to stay to long and burden them more than necessary. After we   
recovered we decided to leave, but we were afraid that once we left we   
would die of starvation like we would have if the couple had not taken   
us in. We weren't afraid of dying but we were concerned for Aya. If we   
died she would have no one to care for her. That was when I was forced   
to make the most difficult decision of my life, I had to give Aya   
away. I saw how the couple was fond of her and begged them to care for   
Aya and they agreed. They offered to let us stay but we did not want to   
cause them anymore trouble so we left.   
To this day I always wonder how my little granddaughter is. I   
regret giving her away many times but that was the only choice left to   
me then. I don't know if it was a good or a bad decision, but all I can   
do is hope that it was a good one and that the couple was kind to her   
and that she is happy."  
  
"I'm sure you made the right decision Makoto-san. Arigatou de gozaimasu   
for telling me all this and helping me, though I have to ask you one   
question. Why are you going out of the way to help me like this?"  
  
"I'm doing this because you need help. You haven't had many people   
treating you kindly throughout your life have you?"  
  
"No." Soujiro whispered softly.  
  
"There is a part of you, Soujiro, that reminds me of Aya. I think it is   
your innocence. You have a certain feel of wounded innocence to you   
like a lost child that I can't help but react to. Maybe I'm just trying   
to seek redemption for giving up Aya through you. I don't know but I   
just feel a great desire to help you." Makoto told him smiling   
wistfully, "I wish I could help you heal whatever wound you carry that   
hurts you so much, but all I can do is offer you a place to rest.   
You are welcomed to stay here as long as you want but please stay here   
at least a week so that you can get your strength back. After that you   
can leave whenever you feel like leaving or you can choose to live here   
with us if you want."  
  
Soujiro could not believe his ears. Makoto-san had managed to see   
within him something that none other could see, the lost child. Not   
only that but she wanted to help him for no other reason than that he   
needed help. She offered her home to him and all he could do was smile   
gratefully at her and whisper, "Arigatou. You've helped me a lot   
already."   
  
Makoto smiled at him and nodded and the two continued with the rest of   
their work silently. Around midday, Makoto-san turned to Soujiro,   
"Soujiro-kun, would you mind taking Akira his lunch for me. He's   
working out in the fields right now and if someone doesn't get him to   
stop for lunch he won't think to by himself. You walk south along the   
road and then take a right at the fork in the road. Just follow it   
until you see him. I'm afraid if you don't get him to take a break   
he'll get sick."  
  
"I'd be happy to take it to him Makoto-san." Soujiro replied walking up   
to her and taking the package she offered to him.  
  
"Here I packed two lunches. Why don't you have lunch with Akira and   
then go off and enjoy the rest of your day? I can handle the rest of   
the work myself. Go have fun, but be back a little before sunset for   
supper."  
  
"Are you sure, Makoto-san?"  
  
"Hai. Hai. Go."  
  
Soujiro took the package that Makoto-san held out to him and left the   
house following her instructions. He walked along the road breathing in   
the fresh air and enjoying the sight of a pretty summer day. The heat   
no longer bothered him since he was rested and had a food in his   
stomach. His mind was at ease for the first time since his battle with   
Himera-san. He thought about the things Makoto-san said to him and   
the guilt he had dissipated and was replaced at by a calm acceptance.   
Makoto-san had spoken the truth. That night that he had killed his   
family, he had no other choice. If he had not killed them, then he   
would never have survived till this day. Now all he could do is go on   
with his life and leave the past behind him. Now maybe he could live   
his life and be truly happy.  
  
He finally reached the field and saw Akira-san bent over some of his   
crops hoeing the ground. Waving his arms in greeting he called out to   
Akira-san. Akira looked up and waved back at him and walked over.  
  
"Akira-san, Makoto-san sent me to bring you your lunch." Soujiro told   
the old man cheerily.  
  
Akira smiled warmly at Soujiro and beckoned him to follow him to a nice   
shaded area. The two sat down and opened up the packages that Makoto   
had sent to them. The two ate in silence. When Akira finished his meal   
he stood up and walked back to continue tending the crops. Soujiro   
watched Akira-san for a few moments and noticed how strenuous the work   
seemed to be and how difficult it was for the old man. Getting up he   
walked over to Akira-san and offered to help. Akira-san smiled at him   
gratefully and handed him another hoe. The two worked together quietly   
until just before dusk then began their walk home, for Soujiro had   
already started to feel as if the old couple's hut had become his home.  
  
For four months he stayed with the old couple. He felt the need to   
leave but could not bring himself to leave the comfort and tranquility   
he found in the couple's home. So he stayed there and his days feel   
into a schedule. During the morning he would assist Makoto-san with her   
work and then take Akira-san his lunch and helped him with his work in   
the field during the afternoon. He was happy there until the day his   
happiness and peace of mind was once again shattered.  
  
On a stormy day during late autumn he had told Akira-san to go home   
early since the sky gave indication that a harsh autumn storm was   
about to blow in. Soujiro lingered in the field a few minutes longer to   
finish tending a patch of grains as Akira-san went ahead. When he   
finished Soujiro began his trek home. As he neared the hut he saw thick   
black smoke rising up into the air mixing with the dark ominous rain   
clouds. Gasping in horror he ran full speed towards the hut and stopped   
in horror at the site before him. The hut was on fire and Makoto-san   
was laying on the ground her blood soaking into the dark brown earth. A   
pack of bandits surrounded Akira-san. When Soujiro stopped the bandits   
and Akira turned their attention to him. Upon seeing him Akira-san's   
eyes widened in terror and he screamed out, "Run, Soujiro!"  
  
"Shut up, old man!" one of bandits yelled as his sword slashed across   
Akira-san's back.   
  
Time seemed to slow momentarily for Soujiro as he watched Akira's body   
falling towards the earth and the bandits laughing in malicious glee.   
He watched with horror as Akira-san's blood splattered on the bandits'   
faces and the sword dripped with blood. Red clouded his eyes as some   
blood flew at him and splashed across his face reminding him of scenes in   
his past he wanted to forget. With a cry of rage Soujiro charged at the   
bandits. Before a thought passed through a single one of their minds the   
bandits were on the ground, knocked unconscious by the hoe Soujiro carried  
within his hands. Dropping the hoe Soujiro staggered over to Akira's body   
and gently picked him up. Akira's eyes fluttered open and he looked at   
Soujiro with sad understanding.  
  
"Soujiro..."  
  
"Akira-san, please don't talk. Just hold on a few minutes and I'll get   
you to a doctor."  
  
"Iie. Please, let me talk. It's no use getting me to a doctor. You'll   
never get there in time."  
  
"Just hold on for a few minutes please. You'll be okay." Soujiro begged   
tears starting to blur his eyesight.  
  
"I only have a few minutes left. Don't argue with me. I'm old. I would   
have died sooner or later anyway. Makoto is dead and without her I   
wouldn't live much longer nor would I want to. I've lived a long full   
life. I have no regrets about dying now. I had one true regret my   
entire life and I think Makoto already told you about it. Listen to me   
Soujiro. You were like a grandchild to Makoto and I. During the short   
time that you lived with us, we loved you like we loved Aya. In a way   
we found redemption for giving Aya away through you. Through you we had   
a second chance at what we gave up and we found the forgiveness we   
longed for. For that we thank you."  
  
"Akira-san, please don't die. You don't need to thank me; I'm the one   
who needs to thank you. You and Makoto-san have done so much for me.   
Onegai, let me get a chance to repay you for your kindness."  
  
Akira coughed a hacking cough that caused blood to well up in his   
mouth. Bringing a hand weakly up to his mouth he wiped the blood away   
and continued, "You don't need to repay us for anything. We were happy   
to have met you and to be given the opportunity to help you. Look   
around the fireplace. You should find a loose brick somewhere along the   
bottom of it. If you remove the loose brick you'll find a metal box.   
Inside that metal box is some money that Makoto and I have been saving   
for several years now. It's not much but it should be of some help to   
you on your journey. Take the money. Please consider it as our parting   
gift to you. Continue your journey and find whatever it is you are   
searching for."  
  
"Iie. I can't take your money."  
  
"Yes you can. We have no more living relatives and we loved you like   
you were our own. You'll need some money for your journey. Use it to   
buy food along the way or whatever else you need. Makoto would not be   
happy if you ended up starving because she wasn't around to take care   
of you. Take care of yourself Soujiro. Find what you are looking for   
and be happy. That's all we ask of you. Find happiness. Whatever past   
that haunts you leave it and go on with your life. Onegai..." Akira   
whispered softly before closing his eyes.  
  
"Akira-san? Akira-san? Iie...you can't die! Onegai!" Soujiro screamed   
shaking the still body of the old man. For the first time in many years   
Soujiro cried. Tears fell heedlessly down his cheeks to splatter on the   
still pale face of Akira. This time though there was no rain to   
disguise his tears. The sky was over cast like that fateful night years   
ago but no rain fell. The hut continued burning silently behind his   
slumped over figure. Silently Soujiro released the life less body of   
the old man and walked away to find a shovel. He dug two holes in the   
ground, and as he laid the bodies of the old couples in their   
respective holes the sky opened up and rain poured down upon their   
graves. The rain washed the tears from Soujiro's face and extinguished   
the inferno that was once the tiny hut. Finding two large stones he   
picked up the sword of one of the bandits and engraved upon it, "Namura   
Akira," and "Namura Makoto." He set the stones at the head of each   
newly dug grave and walked slowly to the smoldering ashes of the hut.   
Finding the metal box and removing the money from it, he walked   
silently away tears and a rain mixing upon his face. He walked away   
never once looking back.  
  
Soujiro felt something warm and moist sliding down his cheeks. Startled   
he jerked out of his reverie just in time to see his tear drop upon the   
morning glory and sliding down to mix with the morning dew. Smiling   
ironically at the tears, he raised the sleeve of his blue dogi to his   
face and wiped the remaining traces of the tear away. Pasting a serene   
smile upon his face he continued walking. The sword, that he had used   
some of the money to buy, gently pressed against his side as he walked   
along. He had learned a lot from the Namura's and now he was going to   
continue on trying to fulfill the one thing they had ever asked from   
him. He was going to try and live his life and be happy and he was   
going to do it by protecting the weak. Shishio-san was wrong the weak   
didn't have to die because they had people like Himera-san and now him   
to protect them.  



End file.
